Queries & Responses for 05 July 2005

devil in german
Traditionally it’s rendered der Teufel but our in-‌house linguists suggest a more timely alternative in der amerikanische Präsident.
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05 July 2005 · international issues · politics
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German—The Devil’s Dictionary X™
execute perl from terminal window
Okay. 
apv@jasper[22]~>perl -e1
There you go. Y’all over think this stuff.
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05 July 2005 · Internet & computing
ann coulter is a cunt [2]
And I’m a cock. So? None of us is irreducible. A good thing to focus on in public life is kindness and etiquette so that you’ll have more support when the ad hominem guns are brought to bear on you during your quarter hour.
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05 July 2005 · Ps & Qs
Jesus had high IQ
Stinky Jesus What?! Talk about grasping at straws.
What if Jesus was retarded? Seriously. What if He was? The Bible doesn’t say He wasn’t. His miracles are neither math intensive nor creative—give the blind vision, heal the sick. Wow, who would have thought of that? Some kinda genius.
His physical appearance has nothing to do with whether He was the son of God or not. What if He was butt-‌ugly? What if He had severe acne and body odor—stank like a bucket of dead crabs?
Would it change how you felt? The Bible says nothing about His physical form except that He was entirely human. Those are human traits and He could have had them. I think it’s interesting that you would care either way.
Don’t kid yourself, you’re no ascetic. You care because your faith is about as deep as you are and your worship is grounded in celebrity and loneliness.
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05 July 2005 · Bible study
The page found by the original query:
Sedition·com: Never take an IQ test
JavaScript converting string to TitleCase
Titlecase—or title case—is the capitalization of all words but articles and prepositions. Without a full grammar parser this isn’t possible to do perfectly because things like acronyms and punctuation interfere, however, the following code will almost always do the trick in English.
Sidebar: JavaScript is probably the wrong language to use for this because it’s transient. Your data should be corrected, not your presentation of your data.
First extend the String built-‌in object to do the titlecasing for you so it works natively on all string objects. 
<script type="text/javascript">
// (c)GPL, apv
String.noLC = new Object
  ({the:1, a:1, an:1, and:1, or:1, but:1, aboard:1,
    about:1, above:1, across:1, after:1, against:1,
    along:1, amid:1, among:1, around:1, as:1, at:1,
    before:1, behind:1, below:1, beneath:1, beside:1,
    besides:1, between:1, beyond:1, but:1, by:1, 'for':1,
    from:1, 'in':1, inside:1, into:1, like:1, minus:1,
    near:1, of:1, off:1, on:1, onto:1, opposite:1,
    outside:1, over:1, past:1, per:1, plus:1,
    regarding:1, since:1, than:1, through:1, to:1,
    toward:1, towards:1, under:1, underneath:1, unlike:1,
    until:1, up:1, upon:1, versus:1, via:1, 'with':1,
    within:1, without:1});

String.prototype.titleCase = function () {
  var parts = this.split(' ');
  if ( parts.length == 0 ) return '';

  var fixed = new Array();
  for ( var i in parts ) {
    var fix = '';
    if ( String.noLC[parts[i]] )
    {
      fix = parts[i].toLowerCase();
    }
    else if ( parts[i].match(/^([A-Z]\.)+$/i) )
    { // will mess up "i.e." and like
      fix = parts[i].toUpperCase();
    }
    else if ( parts[i].match(/^[^aeiouy]+$/i) )
    { // voweless words are almost always acronyms
      fix = parts[i].toUpperCase();
    }
    else
    {
      fix = parts[i].substr(0,1).toUpperCase() +
                 parts[i].substr(1,parts[i].length);
    }
    fixed.push(fix);
  }
  fixed[0] = fixed[0].substr(0,1).toUpperCase() +
                 fixed[0].substr(1,fixed[0].length);
  return fixed.join(' ');
}
</script>
Once that’s loaded, the method can be called on any string. 
<script type="text/javascript">
  var title = 'this is badly cased in the u.s.a.';
  alert( title.titleCase() );
</script>
You might also want to alter the first line to: 
  var parts = this.toLowerCase.split(' ');
Which will deal with things like, “STOP SHOUTING, JACKASS,” but which will also wreck things that are properly titled already and cannot be fixed programatically like “McDonald.”
Check these extended JavaScript object classes for more related goodies.
See also javascript make text titlecase, for a live demo.
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05 July 2005 · Internet & computing
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Code snippets in Perl and JavaScript
easiest bomb to make
No. It’s never easy and it’s wrong. If an innocent dies, you lose all moral ground and can only be a criminal. Also it’s ineffective and turns many potential allies against you.
The easiest bomb to make is a bomb threat. No one dies and if done correctly you will waste almost as much time and tax payer money as a real bomb.
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05 July 2005 · advice & self-help
ANN coulter naked [2]
Gastrointestinal tract evacuated.
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05 July 2005 · politics
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